VA: I wish I had a boyfriend so he could carry my stuff at the mall.
VA: You may think of anything I say as a whiteboard. Erase at will. PLEASE erase at will.
Patience: I... am going to the moon. And we all know how the moon ith.
VA: And how is the moon?
Robbie: Man, I wish we communicated in math problems. I would be so good at spelling.
Jill: I would really like that if it weren't small and ugly.
VA: Get some manpants!
VA: I like it when people spell "humor" with a u.
KB: Your pants match Natalie's.
Rebecca: Natalie had pants on?
Evan: Why are you wearing Underarmor?
Drew: Because it makes my muscles look big.
Evan: Not because you're cold?
Drew: He must be an acquired taste, cuz he's really hott when he's drinking water.
VA: Not only did the heathen smoke, he had a child. That's what happens when you smoke.
VA: Apparently when you become a mother you immediately learn to knit.
KB: I already know how to knit.
VA: Where's the child?!
KB: Did you kill anyone today?
VA: No one important.
KB: *after dinner* I still don't feel really... fulfilled.
VA: Ha ha! Fulfilled? Get it? Filled?
KB: Uh... yeah... filled.
VA: Wait. Forget everything I said. You know what I meant to say. I was going to tell you some interesting fact about... something smart.
Awesome commercial: Vitamin Water. Because it's much less embarrassing to shop at Big and Tall when you're just... tall.
Kyle: I am sad.
KB: My apologies.
Daddy: What?! Texting in the laundry room?! That's worse than changing in the laundry room!
Mommy: Ok William, let's go to bed.
William: *sits there with his truck*
Mommy: Come on William, it's time for your nap.
William: *still sits with his truck*
Anna: Oh, let me say goodnight to him, Mommy!
William: A no anight! *he and his truck speed down the hall*
KB: What did you do?!
Rebecca: She hit me.
VA: I just miss those old days of... hitting you with my head.
VA: I was just reminiscing.
Patience: Would you rather have a tea party or be in a war?
Genise: You're like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde: The Aquatics Version!
KB: Heavens! A mongrel horde of chickens!
Daddy: I can't take you seriously in those purple shorts.
VA on the phone, while out shopping with Mommy: Hi, um... neither of us could figure out the texting thing... so I'm leaving you a message.
Maggie: *looking at a doll* And you can even tell he's a homeschooler!
KB: Um, what?
Maggie: Cuz he has a belt on and his shirt is tucked in. He even has shoes on!
Maggie: *thinks* Wait. Never mind about the shoes.
Derrick: my best pro is crastination, my worst con is centration
Completely out of the blue:
Derrick: you should write in your status "I'M MARRIED!!!!!"
Derrick: ..........just as soon as I die"
KB: .......but I'm not............
Derrick: ......or the groom arrives!"
Kyle: it may have something to do with my bed being so small
Kyle: it's too small for me
KB: lol, that's pretty sad
Kyle: it's a twin
Kyle: I'm not a twin
KB: neither am I a twin but mine fits me ;-P
KB: well, basically
KB: my toes do protrude occasionally
Kyle: lies, you are a twin
Kyle: if your toes protrude
Kyle: what do yo think MY toes do
Kyle: they're like OMG LOL HELLO
KB: fall off
Kyle: waving to passer bys
Kyle: they're lik omg hellooesssss
Kyle: and I can't do anything about it
Kyle: and my blankets are too small
Kyle: in winter
Kyle: I cry
Kyle: in a silent way
Harry: What's the key to?
KB: ...My soul.
Harry: Whoo! We better take that thing off and bury it a hundred feet underground!
About a random kid in the pool:
SeaBass: Why?! Why do you have that?!
Talking about search patterns in the lifeguard class:
Rose: The grid pattern is for when you have an irregular bottom.
Chich: Hee hee!
KB: *pushing William on the swing* William, are you having fun? Is that exciting?
William: Uh huh. Hoo hoo!
Dan: Oh no! I am stricken with a fit of drowning!
KB: *comes back outside with her coat on*
SeaBass: Oh, that is so cheating.
KB: Sebastian. It's very cold.
SeaBass: But Katie Beth, it's cheating!
KB: Sebastian, it's cold!
SeaBass: Do you have another one?
VA: In my dream last night my alarm clock was named Regret.
Drew: *watching a movie* Rough addiction? Does that say rough addiction?! Why's it rated PG for rough addiction?! That's so stupid! I've never even heard of rough addiction! What iS rough addiction?!
KB: That says rough action.
Val: If you woke up on fire, assuming you had gone to bed not on fire, would you be more surprised that you were on fire, or in pain?
Val: You know, if we had enough caulk, we could probably put this building out to sea.
Driving by a pond:
Patience: Ith that the thea?
Kyle: Would you like a sitting utensil?
Kimberly: Do y'all have music tomorrow?
Kimberly: Ha, ha, ha! A likely story.
Talking about how the Amish have beards down to their ankles:
Kyle: It's in case they have to change.
William: *walks in and goes right up to the poster of the Ten Commandments* *stares at the picture of "Thou Shalt Not Covet"* A dah a tuck. A dah a tuck!
KB: Yeah, a car and a truck!
William: I want dat.
Anna: I should become a scientist who discovers everything!
Maggie: *sees the neighbors having a bonfire* We should go invite us over.
KB: Be careful with that. It's the key to my soul.
Mr. Will: Where's the trash can?
Patience: I wish I had a thell phone tho I could tektht Mommy.
William: Ah tektht Mommy too!
An entire conversation:
Patience: If Makth eatth William'th life then Athe will thave William'th life.
Anna: I'm not showing off! I'm evil ALL the time!
Mommy: Can't argue with that!
Patience: *about me* Her name ith Mushroomth.
Juliet: Oh! Why?
Patience: Becauthe I don't like mushroomth.
KB: Anna, go outside!
KB: Cuz it feels awesome outside!
Anna: But I am awesome INSIDE.
Rebecca: I think my nose has gotten stronger from playing this song.
Maggie: Can I play with your mouth?
KB: You need to rephrase that.
Juliet: *typing* Heartheart... ahh, no! I can't believe I almost typed that!! Stop!
Clayton: but if you can make me fly for free, and it's in about a month and a half or two months, I'd love to.
Juliet/KB: I'll have to adopt you
akward, but plausible
Clayton: Well, my useless turkeys...
Clayton: "This incredible shameless attempt to get into KB's quotables has been brought to you by Clayton Sandham"
Clayton: Okay I don't comment on KB's blog...
I do on Juliet's, as long as they aren't tremendously touching and I don't know what to say...
Juliet/KB: But our minds are rather out of it right now ;)
We merged into one to make it more coherent.
Clayton: quite obviously.
and now I'm going insane... Thanks, Girls.
Right after we tell Clayton our minds have merged:
Juliet, on KB's lappy: Anytime, anytime.
At the same time:
KB: Anytime, anytime.
Us: WOAH. THAT IS SO WEIRD.
KB: The lightning bugs are out!
KB: Over there. See the lights?
Juliet: Those weren't helicopters?
Shannon: In TWO DAYS YOU'LL BE IN MY ROOM
Juliet/KB: I KNOW!!
Shannon: AND WE CAN STAY UP LATE AND TALK
AND WAKE UP AND YOU'LL BE THERE TOO
Juliet/KB: dyyying KB: In her room? That sounds so awful.
Shannon: (It sounds like we're getting married)
EVERYONE KNOEW WHAT I MEANT
We're laughing o'er here.
Juliet/KB: We're useless turkeys
Shannon: I <3 turkeys
So glad one is coming to visit me soon
Shannon: (What the heck?)
As I spew ridiculousness
Juliet/KB: Waaaaiiiting for the browser
KB: I would not wear those...
Shannon: No DUH
Juliet/KB: In accord with her.
They look like... dutch slippers.
All my friends think they're ugly
My family, too
Juliet: I'm glad we provide ample entertainment
Does that mean you're buying them?
Just to spite all.
Shannon: AND GUESS WHAT THEY'RE COMING TO ME IN THE MAIL SOMETIME VERY SOON
We love you.
It wasn't out of spite, really
Juliet/KB: You amaze us.
Shannon: Although, that's certainly a sweet after taste
Phoebe: Dangit is a bad wowd and so is stupid.
William: Don't touch my fabs!
Hana: *pokes him in the side*
William: They're nice fabs.
Hana: Quick, Grace, what's Micah 6:8?
Perfectly silent moment as Grace tries to remember
Grace: He has shown you O man what is good, and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk mer--muh--
Grace: With thy God.
KB: I liked that moment of silence there. I was thinking, "That's probably the quietest this house has ever been!"
Grace: I was thinking, "I'd better speak faster before Katie Beth says something!"
Juliet: Katie Beth, I was sleeping underneath your bed because I love you.